Saturday 27 June 2009

reflections... and an addiction!

Yesterday, I was thinking about my own weight loss journey and how far I've come; (and sometimes gone back) this is the longest I have committed to doing it. Six months and counting... I still think after this amount of time I probably could have lost a lot more. But you know life intervenes and its not just an easy simple journey or else we'd all be frickin' skinny. And our blogs would must definitely be dull.

So what's different for me this time round? Several things. My attitude for one. Although its never 100 percent right there on the w.loss front it is a 100 times improved from the last time I attempted to lose weight a couple of years ago. My commitment. Again not the best but definitely improved. The last time I did it I quit after one gain. One gain. Stupid... Now I am learning to over come and accept gains, not always quickly or easily but accept them and just move on. Acceptance that this journey is LONG and there are no real quick fixes, that I have to actually deal with all the emotional crap that comes with it too.

This time I feel like I actually want it. Well at least a considerable amount more then before. Even when I am miserable and am mid binge I realise I DON'T WANT TO BE FAT. Sometimes I lose sight of such things which leads to me the biggest help/improvement for this journey...

Blogging. I know this probably sounds over dramatic and very soppy but I could not have started this with out my blog, without reading others experiences, by making good friends with people that actually know what its like and having their sound advice to help me along the way. Just posting whats on my mind has helped me an incredible amount. But finding inspirational and motivational people has been my saviour. Some of you will NEVER be rid of me so, y'know, hold on to your hats... So thank you to all who have been around since my journey started and an even bigger thanks to those who reached out to me when I was rock bottom and apologies to those who I plague daily!

On a diet note...It's only the third day on the calorie counting malarkey and I feel so free. Loving it. However, the scale addict in me did climb aboard this morning. Everyone was in bed so I sneakily did it. My Mam has been very vigilant about my scale habits but I think she may have to finally hide it. I can't just give up checking my numbers... so it looks like cold turkey is my only option. Just so you know it has me down two pounds...

over and out.

11 comments:

Mary :: A Merry Life said...

Very interesting stuff.

Blogging has definitely helped me too. I feel like I can't fail, if that makes sense. I now have way more people encouraging me now than I do in real life. Its awesome.

Mary :: A Merry Life said...

I so wasn't finished with my commenting. LOL.

I also wanted to say that it is awesome that you've been committed for 6 months already. It might not have been the perfect 6 months you dreamed of, but it has been good and you've made progress. I'm proud of you!

Carlos said...

awesome simone, rock that shit, and keep blogging im hooked!

Katie said...

3 days into your new plan and 2 lbs down? That's great! I fully believe that you'll be successful!

antgirl said...

I don't ever want to be rid of ya.

This blog community is tops. :-D Great people.

Remember, its a process and it isn't always about the numbers. Making a breakthrough in getting more comfortable with a new habit is more important or a shift in attitude that gets you start making better choices more consistently.

The weight loss will come in its time. Faster than you think. When you look back you'll be like, wow what the frick was I frustrated about?

It's baffling. Keep it up!

F. McButter Pants said...

Man, I left this long, thoughtful, inspiring comment...this morning! I don't know what happened to it.

I kept thinking the entire day how you said that you gave up after the 1st awhile back, and how stupid it seems now. I think that is really that best thing I have read all day.

Never give up! We don't have to be perfect, we just can't quit.

so glad I found your blog!

F. McButter Pants said...

there was suppose to be a LOL after that thoughtful, inspiring crap...it WAS long though....lol

Unknown said...

blogging is a HUGE help to me as well. Im glad your not going anywhere- and if you did I would have to come hunt you down. lol This is our lil community of support and its nice to know we are not alone in our struggles. :)

(((HUGS)))

Someone needs to HIDE that scale from you...but yeah on being down. :)

big_mummy said...

omg girl I am going to come and beat you with that scale!!! (nice loss though!)

had any bread yet!?

Apex Zombie said...

It's all a part of the journey. The highs and the lows. All the previous attempts just set you up for this round :) And don't worry about whether you could or should have lost more. You're losing, getting healthy, that's the main thing!

Glad to hear the calorie counting is going well!

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

Very insightful! I'm so happy you started blogging, it's bloggers like you, sincere and real, that inspire me, so thank you!