This week has been an experience. I hit an all time low mentally and physically an all time high. The two are not a great combination. In fact just typing that sentence has exhausted me. everything these days does. That extra weight I have gained is actually starting to physically hurt me. I have always been fat but it is starting to affect my life noticeably. My work uniform is shrinking, my back aches, my feet hurt, the thighs are rubbing again, I am exhausted all the time, I just want to sleep and eat and do nothing.
I weighed in at my weight watchers meeting and after a seven pound gain took me over a weight threshold I never thought I hit. I broke down. Sobbing frantically. My leader hugged me till I stopped and sat me aside till we worked through some stuff. I didn't care that everyone was looking at me or I stopped others weighing in. I was a mess. I hope I can work up the courage to go next week.
I can't make any promises or even put in to words what I actually need to do to get back on track because there is so much. So one thing at a time, slowly slowly til I feel the momentum catching me again.