This week has been an experience. I hit an all time low mentally and physically an all time high. The two are not a great combination. In fact just typing that sentence has exhausted me. everything these days does. That extra weight I have gained is actually starting to physically hurt me. I have always been fat but it is starting to affect my life noticeably. My work uniform is shrinking, my back aches, my feet hurt, the thighs are rubbing again, I am exhausted all the time, I just want to sleep and eat and do nothing.
I weighed in at my weight watchers meeting and after a seven pound gain took me over a weight threshold I never thought I hit. I broke down. Sobbing frantically. My leader hugged me till I stopped and sat me aside till we worked through some stuff. I didn't care that everyone was looking at me or I stopped others weighing in. I was a mess. I hope I can work up the courage to go next week.
I can't make any promises or even put in to words what I actually need to do to get back on track because there is so much. So one thing at a time, slowly slowly til I feel the momentum catching me again.
6 comments:
Well I tried to go into email mode, but I don't seem to have your email in my contact list. I swear we've emailed before!!! GRRRRR
Anyway...it took a lot of moxy for you to write that post. I am right there with you. Maybe we can figure this out together?
kidsrme@hotmail.com
Hoping you find the inspiration... we are all here for you!
Oh no, this makes me so sad to read, Simone :( I want you healthy and happy. Do you think you need help that you yourself can't provide? Nutritionist, therapist, etc? fb me if you want to talk <3
Oops... let's try this again.
Been thinking about you lately and glad to see that you posted. I am sorry you are feeling the way you do. YOU can change my sweet girl! You have to commit to yourself and know that YOU are worth it.
Hugs. I know its hard when you set a threshold that you will not pass and pass it. I have done that to myself so many times. Sending hugs and hopes that maybe you will find inspiration in your time of despair
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