Monday 30 June 2014

Well hello there...

So it has been two years since my last post….

And 'Where have I been? My progress so far?'

The answer is no where and nothing.

Lost all of that weight and overcome all of those challenges for nothing. Back to square one. But here I am once again calling on the help of the blog. This is not about followers or an audience. It is for me. Some thing to get me back on track because I can no longer continue on this self destructive path. I can already feel myself spiralling out of control. This time however it comes with a heavy emotional price. I am depressed. A recent trip to the doctor has seen me on the way to medication. Initially, the thought of pills 'happy pills' as my mother calls them made me feel embarrassed and stupid. Now I am trying to accept that I need whatever help I can get.

I don't want to be sleeping my life away.
Or pushing away all of my friends.
The constant miserableness, loneliness and sadness is too much.

I need my life back.
And that starts today.

I have done the mundane things to distract me from worrying about work. My two week absence starts today. I am trying everything I can not to dwell on it or add it to my stress list. I must keep the miserable at bay.

I am trying.

3 comments:

Michelle said...

Welcome back...I too am unfortunately back where I started and am thinking about reviving my blog - maybe it will help maybe not but its worth a try. Good luck to you.

big_mummy said...

I'm so glad you're back to blogging. I'm here xxx

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