Wednesday, 2 September 2009

the return of the serial whiner...

Firstly, (I know I say this an awful frickin' lot) but the support I get on this blog blows me away. It really does. I can't thank everyone who commented enough, I cannot stress how grateful I truely am for the kind words, sane advice and kicks up the bum. I PUFFY HEART YOU PEOPLE. yes you. *points*

This week I was in a dark dark dark dark place. It was pretty dark. It was the blackhole of self pity and major frustation. Not good. My mood just plummeted dramatically and could not pull myself out of it. Infact the only thing good enough to lift my spirits was a call to say I could move into the new flat. ON FRIDAY. That's right people I am frickin' moving. *content sigh* That call literally brightened up my entire week. Creeping out of that black hole was pretty sucky. I cried quite alot. Did I mention I'm a serial sobber? My stomach cramping from so much bad food was the trigger. When your body is screaming out don't do this, its a pretty good frickin' sign to eat healthy. Did I listen? oh no. More crying. More munching.

Also just reading about those people who lose weight consistantly everyweek kinda stop motivating me and made me miserable. Instead of rooting for them I was just jealous and sick of not being like that, not staying focused and making stupid mistakes. I feel really bad admitting to that. Seriously you big consistant losers I love yer. Honest. Just y'know, having a baaaaaaaaaaaad week!!!

Turns out that I wasn't the only one feeling this way. Sometime I forget other people have been through this weight loss crap. I want to highlight what hope_fool said in response to my major downer post... click here. TA DAH. What she said about weightloss being a rock that you're pushing up hill really stuck with me. I appreciate her post, alot. Also Amber over on her blog.... *blog portal here* Summed up a lot of how I felt. Thank you for your support my lovely ladies.

I felt like I couldn't blog because it was the same old whiney crap. Figured it would be better to let the pity party fizzle out. Plus I really would just be repeating myself. This time I am not making grid iron promises that I am religously going to be back on track. Those promises usually come back to bite my fat arse. And things are going to busy and shit with moving, plus I haven't seen my flat mate in like three months so there is some catching up and celebrating to be done. It doesn't mean I am abandoning all moderation or going off the rails.

Which leads me to... an explained absence. Not sure when we're going to get the internet in the flat so I will MIA for a couple more days. Gonna go catch up with some bloggity blogs!

*edit*
My mother got her shit together. her blog is here.... shrinking violet.
If you have a spare minute just say hi or something....

18 comments:

Monica said...

It sounds like it was a horrible week for you and Im so glad that youre back! Simone~you have come such a long way, dont give up now! Maybe youve hit a plateau, maybe not, but keep pushing, girlie, youre gonna get there.

antgirl said...

I can relate to sucking black holes of despair and misery. That was once my life ... for years and years. Gads, that sucked.

Do NOT compare yourself to others. Every body loses and comes around in their own time. Speed means nothing if it doesn't stick. Slow in meandering still gets you to the same place and is more likely to keep you there.

Glad you get to move. Will miss ya while you're gone! Hang in there Simone, the sun always rises in the morning. :)

MackAttack said...

I'm so glad you posted! I know those feelings but who cares if you are repeating yourself, I feel like our blogs should be a type of therapy to help us work through issues, and how many therapy sessions have you repeated yourself? (for me its almost all of them) sometimes the third/fourth/fifth time is the charm. Good luck with the big move, I'm so excited you are getting out on your own!

Learning to be Less said...

THANK GOD!! So glad you are back. Even better that you are moving. I think that will lift your spirits. Moving sucks but you will burn calories. Positive side.

Will you have a normala bed now?

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

Anytime you need to vent or cry or whine I'm here sweets...

arielcircleofnine said...

I am SO glad you're back!!! we all have those dark dark dark days or weeks, luckily the smoke clears and we can smile (and put down the chalupas!) again! YAY for moving on Friday...get thee onto the 'net asap! :-)

anne h said...

Precious Lamb. Glad Ewe are back.
Sorry, I couldn't resist!
Glad you are ok!

jo said...

Hey, I gained this week--either that or I was full of sh*t. Believe me, I've had those feelings about others. I compare myself that I'm not losing as fast as others. And seven years ago? When I went to Weight Watchers, the night I got my 50-pound star, a big deal there, some gal who had just joined a month earlier got hers that night, too! I was crushed. I was happy for her, but I didn't stay for another meeting. Then I quit. Then I gained all my weight back plus some.

(That gal had a lot to lose and was also on some weight-loss drug--I saw her in the store and congratulated her and she told me. I was a bit less crushed after that. lol)

I never admitted that before, I don't think. So get it out there on the blog so it doesn't fester inside! If you have to write the same post every day, DO IT. Get it out of your system. That is unless you're moving to your new flat and don't have internet access. Seriously--write and don't worry about what happens, you know we all love ya and your blog!!!

Hugs, happy moving!!!

Mary :: A Merry Life said...

I'm sorry you had such a horrid week. :( But things are looking up now, right? At the very least you get to move into a new flat! Yay!

SeaShore said...

I'm glad you did not stay away long, and I hope your internet is connected in your new place soon!

Oh, the trap of comparing yourself to others. I sooo do that, even though I know I'm me, not them. Still, sometimes when I read about people who lose every week or eat healthy all of the time, I can't help but wonder 'what's wrong with me?'

Everyone has their own formula which will work for them in the long term. I'll try to remember that if you will ;)

Fat Lazy Guy said...

Glad to read from you again. And woop on the new flat! Sucky times suck =/

Jenn said...

Glad you're climbing out of your funk. Been there, so I know how bad you felt. I hope your move goes relatively smoothly. It's funny how life sometimes gives us exactly what we need!

Fit Fabulous 40's Flab Free said...

Reading your post today....OMG I thought it was me writing it. I totally understand where you are coming from. This is a hard road for sure but just know we are all there for you.

Emily said...

YAY - I am glad you are moving!! Good luck with it all!!!
Big hugs.

Fat[free]Me said...

Great news about the flat and for carrying on with the blog and everything.

I am sorry to be a demotivating loser, lol! But, seriously, the last 20 YEARS haven't been quite so successful :(

I buried my head in the sand and just continued to get fatter, at least you are working towards a healthier you, NOW which is what matters.

Good luck with the move and keep us posted on how you are doing.

F. McButter Pants said...

I puffy heart you too! I am so excited for your move.

Don't party too much. DO NOT take too long of a break. I will miss you!!

I know how you feel about getting jealous. Why, why why do we put yourselves thru that torture. Next time you catch yourself doing that think how evil it is....lol

Happy move and a big hug!!

Tasha said...

Happy to see you peeked your face back around!!! Have a great move, refocus and collect your thoughts on a mini brain-vacay...

Losing Waist! said...

Hey! You seem like you might be emerging into the light...

I stand by the thought that this post is major progress for you- I relate to a 1000 times of getting into a dark place, and staying in that dark place. Working though it is ALL you can do.