LOSER and not the good kind...

I am sick of writing the same old excuses for eating with reckless abandon. I am sick of typing it. Sick of telling it to myself. Seeing it on my blog. Feeling stupid because I am definitely not learning. I ACTUALLY FEEL PHYSICALLY SICK. My body hates what I have done this week. Yet I do it any way. WHY? I am really stupid. Too lazy to say no. Whiny. Full of lame excuses. Broken promises. Even this sounds like a fuckin' broken record.

I read other peoples blogs and give encouragement and advice and try to motivate them. How can I do that when I can't do it for myself? I feel like a huge hypocrite. A FRAUD. Then when people make mistakes like I do and whine like I do, I am all just DO IT. STOP FUCKING WHINING. but it is hard. There is no point going on like this. It's making me miserable. I need to get my fucking head back in the game.

Hope you're all still here when I dig my head out the sand!
Ciao for now.

whingey whiner

Huge thanks to all the lovely comments you left for my mother. She will actually be starting her own blog as of some time today. I will literally keep you posted.

*high fives* to the awesome people who also complimented me! Don't worry I noticed, those brownie points add up!

Not a real lot to say. Everyone comes back today. This sounds mean but I haven't missed the boys one bit. It meant I didn't have to sleep on an air bed, the risk of having take out went down to like zero ('cause I been cooking healthy for my Mam), there was no fighting, no arguing and no mess. This week has been nice. Just to spend some time with the mamabear but also not to be stressed out too much (my sister did stir up some shit). My sister got paid so she's paying me the rest of the money she owes me. HUZZAH. Haven't heard anything on the new flat though but its a stupid bank holiday so thats delaying stuff too. booooooo. *fingers crossed*

Even though everything is going ok today I am finding it hard to smile. BAH.

the mothership has landed.

Ok. Folks, be gentle. This is my first and probably only guest post. And it’s my Mam. She said she’s gonna find it hard to continue her weightloss journey once I leave for Manchester and knowing how awesome the blogging community is I recommended she sign up…. However she’s shy and reluctant to get it all out there so here she is testing the waters…


Hello there…

I’m Alison. The mother. Mamabear. The occasional pain in the bum. (other various titles….)

I would just like to say how proud of Simone I am for getting this far on her weight loss journey, I really cannot get that across enough. However there are a few things about it that makes me worry about her…
Her obsession.

I believe that there is a fine line between obsession and dedication and weighing in six or seven times is a day is a line crossed. This behaviour scared me to be honest. So reluctantly she gave it up. I have now hidden (for the most part, she can be sneaky) the scales and only unleash them for the weekly weigh in. Weighing in daily seriously affected her mood, whether the numbers were good and bad. I don’t think she realised just how strongly the scales affected her. It did have an impact on the rest of the family too.

Another thing that I do try to keep an eye on is her frequent worrying over where the weight is coming off and how slowly. She is so impatient. I fear she thinks about this too much and doesn’t focus on the long term. I keep telling her slow and steady wins the race. This journey is for the long haul not short stay. It is real life and we don’t get magic wands.

Getting a bit miserable there, moving on…
I do believe that this time she is truly dedicated to losing this weight and at times her motivation is quite impressive. I know how hard this journey is as I have been on it several times myself and I am glad that she is sticking it out. She really is an inspiration to me.

When I was younger I was skinny, actually underweight and now at age 48 I am the heaviest weight I have ever been. I lost my dad during my early teens and since then have continued to gain weight. I too in January started trying to lose weight with my daughter. I have had some success and some failures too. I know she is not alone, here at home and with you bloggers. (some of which she is always harping on about) I am glad we are doing this along side each other even if sometime we are the devil on each others shoulders.

Living at home has been tough for Simone but I have every faith in that when she returns to Manchester that she will continue on stronger. She will succeed. She does not realise how much I am going to miss her. She has been such a great help to me, motivating me to go the gym, trying to cook me healthy meals. It will break my heart when she leaves. I hope to stay strong when she is not around. I know she will only be a phone call away (perhaps even just a blog comment) but it will be hard.

Thanks for listening.

short and sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeet

The sun is shining.

I am going to kick my fat arse into gear today.

No moaning. Just doing.

That is all.

blah

Last night it all kicked off. Massive family drama. I don't know if I've mentioned it or not but my sister is a huge source of trouble for me. No matter what I do or don't do its my fault. My mam defends her no matter what. And even though she's a bitch to me constantly she's my sister and I love her. But I can't take any more of her crap. A while back I lent her some money and now that I need it for my rent it's not acceptable. LONG STORY SHORT... she went berserk at me last night over the money she owes me. My mam defended her and then threatened to walk out and not come back... because get this... MY ATTITUDE. It was a very surreal moment. I need to get out of this poisonous environment asap. It was just the last straw and I think you can tell from my blog, I am a big ol' cryer. Wear the emotions on the sleeve. So I just broke down and really sobbed. Probably over dramatically but it just came out. (i guess it wasn't just that one moment but the culmination of all the times I let her walk all over me) ok ok ok I'm gonna save the rest for therapy....

Instead of talking to some one about it I went straight for the fridge. And scarfed down anything with cheese. I had a massive cheese overload. And you know what? I don't really even like cheese that much. But it didn't stop me from getting out the nachos practically emptying an entire bag of cheese on it... an entire tub of salsa and just ploughing through it. My only saving grace is that I stopped eating at 95 %... and then I had like 10 spring rolls. Not healthy ones I could easily make at home ooooooooh nooooo. DEEP FAT FRIED ONES. bah.

*points at self* stupid person. I hope I grasp what I am doing before it happens next time. Oh I know there'll be a next time. I just love this shitty repetitive behaviour, don't you? It wouldn't have been too bad but I didn't really pull any moves at the gym. Stupid people chatting all the time. 20 minute limit on the machines. It just sucked.

So today? Completely regret the fat fest. What can I do? Move on. Again. Not whine or obsess about it and hopefully work my butt off the rest of the week and pray to maintain. On top of all this crap my period is like three weeks late. Bah. The fact that it is currently pissing it down outside does not help one ounce. Though it is not like I can't exercise inside...

Postives...
My sister is going away for a couple of days.
Both my brother and dad are away til Saturday.
I should be moving out in less than two weeks.
I finally made it into size 24 at Asda (Walmart) so I got myself two cardigans.
Back on track food wise.
This is only the second time I have sat down all day. Bring on those steps.

Just want to say a massive thank you to all of those lovely people that commented on my guest post on Carlos's blog last week. Which you can read here.... awesomest guest post ever.

tired but feel enthusiastic...

I guess Sarah has worn me out! Got a solid 8 hours last night but still feel a bit sluggish! I have the inner energy, I want to get up and do stuff but my body is refusing to move. I have been doing little bits and pieces such as emptying the dish washer, doing laundry and tidying up but I am still lacking that big motivation rush!! I hope it finds me soon because Tuesday are gym sessions with the mother.

Feeling much better that I am now back on the water. Didn't record a single calorie at Sarah's so trying to get back into the habit of measuring and recording. *nods* on target so far. Can't wait to try out some of the things that wily wench cooked for me. Especially the spring rolls and duck pancakes. There might be a step by step guide to those spring rolls when I get a chance to upload the pictures of my crappy camera phone!

I've procrastinated so much with the post it is actually gym time. Hope my energy surfaces!!

The big_mummy experience and weigh in! *warning* long post!

Do you like the new blog style? Bare with me. Site maintenance!

Well hello there...
I know you've all missed me terribly. I hope your weight loss is going strong despite my lovely self being absent the last couple of days. I hope to catch up with y'all pretty soon!

Firstly because its amazing. Weigh in results.
Current weight: 19 stones 4 pounds (270lbs)
Previous weight: 19 stones 13 pounds (279 lbs)
Highest weight: 21 stones 3 pounds (297 lbs)
Weight loss this week: 9LB loss.
Total weight lost: 1 stone 13pounds (27 lbs)

That's right people. I lost all of the shitty gain and a pound more. Clearly a water/sodium gain last week but never the less I'm down an extra pound. One more pound for an even two stone. This week feels like progress. Ok so enough crowing....

Some of you may know that I went to visit Sarah a.k.a wench a.k.a. big_mummy this week. Yup. A blogger meet up. Also Chuck was around to show us a good time. Man, that chicken is naughty....

Several awesome nsv's happened whilst visiting her.
We went on a 12k walk. oh yes.
I made it into several items of smaller sized clothes
Sarah gave up her scale.
We discovered lower in fat spring rolls. A big weakness of mine.
There maybe more... my memory sucks. Sarah feel free to remind me...

I really cannot begin to say how great a time I had meeting her. Seriously. LOL. This is starting to sound like I'm besotted with her but she is such a great person. I felt we really connected and it wasn't just the weight loss thing that brought us together. I was, if I'm honest, worried that it might be different in person and we would cling to that but alas not to worry as we got on like a house on fire. Even if she is wench (for example: the night before her weigh in she makes herself soup. the night before my weigh in? A roast dinner!) Don't believe anything she says on her blog. I DID NOT TEMPT HER WITH MALIBU.

I got to visit London too. Chuck had an awesome time there. We got loads of frickin' steps in wandering around. She beat me every day with the most steps. What an early rising wench she is. The weather was gorgeous. A pigeon did shit on me. How disgusting is that? I got to see where she blogs from... to be impressed with her cooking skills (I have come away with some awesome recipes/cooking tips) and be generally wowed by what a generous, fun, lovely lady with the dirtiest laugh in England Sarah was. She even packed me a lunch for the train which was foodgasmic by the way. (the man opposite me on the train drooled at the sandwich)

Hotel Big_Mummy is worth the visit. I recommend it whole heartedly. I'm worn out from the walking, happy from the loss and sad to be back sleeping on the fucking airbed. I have already invited myself back! She is stuck with me for life. She best get her arse up to Manchester once I move there.

*edit*
The cheeky wench that she is just said she was disappointed that I didn't rate her in stars.

*p.s Sarah now likes to be called Wench. So y'know if you're posting on her blog show her some love by addressing her that way.

hump day!

And I don't mean the good kinda of humping!

My friend Michael calls Wednesday hump day. It's the middle of the week, you're neither here nor there. Its just gone Monday and not quite the weekend. He hates it. I usually do too. But I've spoken to a couple of my fave bloggers today and they have cheered me up immensely. This is definitely good for weightloss. I feel like I have more energy. I feel good.

ALSO what makes me feel frickin' good is...
I might be moving out of the family home and back to Manchester in about 10 days. How awesome is that?

I am going to stay with Sarah (big_mummy) tomorrow. Wooohoo. A few days away! Can't wait! I love going away! Getting the train into london then changing to go out Sarahs. It's been forever since I went to London. Honestly it's hard to sit still and type this.

And guess who turned up in time for LUNCH... That's right its our good pal Chuck....

Amber from THE LONG HARD ROAD OUT OF HELL was talking about fruit salads and it made me want one soooooooooooooo I had a massive dish full of strawberries and watermelon. It was the perfect desert for eating after a really hot prawn curry. so thank you!!

I am off to give blood soon and in no way did I think this would be a problem to worry about weight wise until I was chatting to Sarah and she was all like some of the tables only take 18 stones... and now I'm a little worried. a. incase i get on it and it breaks or b. they simply say I can't have blood taken and have to be turned away. I guess I just never thought about it. Wish me luck!

on a roll...

Yesterday went pretty well. I hit all my mini targets. Even managed some wii fit time. Though it reminded me I hadn't been on there in a while. and my wii age had significantly crept up! Some thing else to work on. However, during my stepping time the wii board died. Those batteries have lasted since I bought it months ago so it wasn't a bad run however it meant a trip to the co-op. Luckily the batteries were on buy one get one free so that improved my mood!! And instead of walking to just the co-op I walked all the way down to my Grandma's and called to the co-op on the way back. More steppage for me. Though walking back up the hill did make my back twinge for some reason. Bah.

Only made it half way through c25k before my back was screaming :( this is what happens when you sit on your arse for a week and do absolutely nothing, I've had no pain so far so I'm gonna have another crack at it later.

Over eight portions of fruit and veg. I am happy with that. The watermelon was delightful. Starting to drink orange juice again. Yummy. Missed it.

The day is young. 7.45 am (early for me) so I best crack on and so stuff!
Hope today is as good as y,day.

a very shitty but not miserable weigh in

EIGHT POUNDS gain!

Current weight: 19 stones 13 pounds (279 lbs)
Previous weight: 19 stones 5 pounds (271 lbs)
Highest weight: 21 stones 3 pounds (297 lbs)
Weight loss this week: 8lb gain.
Total weight lost: 1 stone 4 pounds (18 lbs)

These numbers make me want to cry but I AM NOT GOING TO CRY. or feel sorry for myself. I know how and why it happened there is nothing more to do but move on and re-lose this shitty shitty gain. Bah. Today is going awesome. Finally slept well, I moved to the couch instead of the air bed. No sister annoying me and it was super comfy. Slept right through. I have energy and a positive attitude. I am two litres of water down and I went grocery shopping with my parents. We have now have a drawer in the fridge full of fruit and veg, low fat yoghurts and dips, no fizzy pop or full fat ice cream. It was quite a good shop for them. I came back pleased. I marched everywhere. I did several trips to the recycling bin to up the steppage. And since its cold out side and Sarah (big_mummy) has been harping on about the wii fit I think I might go do some of that. I am definitely starting my repeat of week 3 c25k today no matter what. I don't know if you can see but this is the drawer filled with goodness it has mushrooms, cucumber, peppers, strawberries, melon, spring onions, grapes, lettuce, blackberries and raspberries and low fat weight watchers cheese!



:D To dull the pain of the gain I bought myself a new top and didn't care that I hadn't moved down a size because I just love it. TA DAH. A little creased from the bag... but....

more blah

I was going to post and then I thought nah. Fuck it, I will.

Nothing really interesting though. Except I am no longer able to sleep on the air bed. It is driving me insane. Plus I was up during the night six times letting the dog in and out. Apparently no one else heard her crying. Today I feel absolutely drained. And slightly grumpy. I exercised yesterday and got my eating on track but the impending weigh in of doom is coming and I really just don't have the energy to summon up some positivity or put the gain into perspective.

I totally regret eating like a wild thing while I was away and now I can feel it eating away at me right now. Why did I do it? Why didn't I show some restraint? I know how I feel afterwards, I hate the gains and yet still I cannot help cracking and going totally out of control. Every frickin' time. and now here is another whiny post. It's getting dull and repetitive and stupid.

*bangs head against wall* I know this shit.

return the of the elusive Mojo

It's back. My mojo returned.
I AM READY TO LEAVE THIS SHITTY FUNK BEHIND.

Yes, I am going to gain on Monday. Yes, it is going to be a crappy leap in the wrong direction but I can't take this week back. It's done. Over. Finished.

I just made a quick list of reasons I am doing this besides seeing the number on the scale and there is a hell of a lot of reasons to lose the poundage. Some times I lose sight of this. This was a great reminder. Just what I needed.

Also my flatmate is back from her trip and she rang me to organise looking for a new flat in Manchester. The prospect of possibly moving out of here soon has cheered me up immensely!! woohooo.

blah blah blah

I didn't jump back into the swing of things yesterday. I was exhausted.
Still not feeling it today either.

Repercussions of eating like crap and no water drinking:

Bad sleeping pattern.
Sluggish feeling.
Bad spotty skin.
A gain.
Feeling hungry when eating normal sized portions.
Low energy.
Mood = really crappy.

Yes. It feels good in the moment but what comes afterwards is so not worth it. Another step forward and one giant leap back. Jack Sh*t has it right in this post.

When will I learn?

the ugly truth....

yes. i did go see the ugly truth at the movies.... but it ain't what I am talking about!

ok ok.. WHO MISSED ME?

The trip in summary...

Positives.

1. The Irish accent makes Irish boys seem ten times hotter. Especially when they play rugby and are staying in your hotel.
2. I loved my iccle cousin. She is the cutest little kidlet ever.
3. I DID NOT HAVE TO USE THE SEAT BELT EXTENDER ON THE PLANE.

Negatives.
1. Flight delays.
2. no sleep what so ever.
3. I DID NOT CALORIE COUNT ONCE.
4. I ATE NOTHING BUT TAKE OUT/RESTAURANT FOOD.
5. I only had one glass of water
6. I did not exercise once
7. There was no 10k steps.

At the least the scales will move this week. Just in the wrong direction.

a sunshine filled video overload.

(might have to plug in headphones or crank up the sound, they're very quiet)

Ok. people get ready to get sick of my ugly mug. Video overload begins here...


For some reason I pressed stop but had more to say...




Then came along this mornings lovely and delightful weigh in.


I hate stay the sames as much as gains. Well, underserved gains... Do you like my true grumphuck face at the end?

It hadn't even gone 6am and my dad had already shouted at me for being upset. I just wanted to scream in his face SOME PEOPLE FUCKING CARE ABOUT LOSING WEIGHT, MR. THREE TAKE OUTS THIS WEEK ALONE. but i didn't. * deep breath*

See you all Wednesday. Do try not to miss me....

Grumphuckity Friday

Yep. Got weighed again. Nothing. Stay the same.
To quote one of my fave bloggers I'm in a right grumphuck today.
Weight loss hates me. Technology hates me. Sleep hates me. My swim suit hates me.
I am no longer excited about going away. I am tired. I am whiny.
I just want lots of yummy Chinese food and I want it now. And pizza. And everyfuckingelse I've stopped eating.

PITY PARTY AT SIMONE'S HOUSE. ALL WELCOME.


Thursday's check list...
minimum of 2 litres of water a day. DONE
10, 000 steps. 14939
no longer than 4 hours to blog.DONE
at least 5 portions of fruit/veg. 9.1
45 minutes of exercise every day. 35 mins of brisk walking. 1 hour stepping
at least one form out door exercise. walked to the library and back. carried laundry to and from my grans.
complete my 30 day sports active on time this time. FAIL
plan meals. (especially for weekends away) DONE.

Thursday and shizzle...

Last night saw me the opposite to positive. My sister was around causing lots of trouble and as usual I got it in the neck. I really don't have the time to explain what happened but its obvious I live in a parallel universe to my family because after all her screaming, vicious hurtful words and foul language I was the bad person... so go figure. So I really was feeling rock bottom. I don't know how much longer I can survive here. My mood is up and down like a vicious yo yo. And last night I was very close to just letting loose and eating what ever the fuck I could get my hands on but instead I had nice chat with my guru and levelled out with three rice cakes, calorie counted of course. I had really good cry... I mean a really cry. Two hours of hard core sobbing. On the plus side I actually got an apology out of her and I had a really good nights sleep. Maybe I needed a release.

My family have eaten out so much this week its annoying. I am so proud of myself for not joining them once. I did crack last week. But no bakery, no fish and chips, no fatty bacon sarnies. Its so hard but my will power is getting strong. I cannot wait to get back to having my own place and getting away from all this negative behaviour. It is driving me insane.

What I am not proud of is. I sneaked a peek on the scales this morning. My mam had left them out and I thought surely this one look won't hurt... why do i do it? Every time. It just disheartens when I think it will motivate. Stoopid. I have decided I do like it best just not knowing until official weigh in. Even if I do complain about it. I just feel like what ever I am doing is just not working.

My sports active work outs are clearly not happening. I just can't get any tv time at all. Sucky but every thing else is bang on so I'm not gonna cry over it. C25k week3day2 went alot better.

minimum of 2 litres of water a day. DONE
10, 000 steps. 10775
no longer than 4 hours to blog.DONE
at least 5 portions of fruit/veg. 9.1
45 minutes of exercise every day. C35K (26 mins) 45 minutes stepping
at least one form out door exercise. did my c25k outside.
complete my 30 day sports active on time this time. FAIL
plan meals. (especially for weekends away) Eating the chilli i made and the fish was lovely.

wednesday and shizzle.

Nothing much to report. Feeling quite on plan! Rocked the gym yesterday! Went with my mam and chatty group. But I stayed and did an extra half an hour. No chatting. It sucked with out my mp3 player. (it went through the wash) but I powered through. I have noticed when I work out really hard, my face dimples. I GET WORK OUT DIMPLES. not cute dimples. Angry red ones. Bah. Oh boy did I stink coming back from there... felt great though.

On a happy note a new notch to my belt was added! That's right! Its the fourth extra hole and has had to go in the middle of a flower pattern! Probably should buy a new belt.... :D

Question: The flab on my arms is breaking up and all lumpy. The skin is going all funny. Any suggestions as what do about it? because really I don't work on my arms at all. Weights and stuff kinda scare me. Suggestions welcome :D

Tuesdays Check list:
minimum of 2 litres of water a day. DONE
10, 000 steps.11249 STEPS
no longer than 4 hours to blog.DONE
at least 5 portions of fruit/veg. 5 portions exactly
45 minutes of exercise every day. 1.5 hours at the gym and some stepping.
at least one form out door exercise. i walked to the co-op small but there it is.
complete my 30 day sports active on time this time. didnt have time. i think i am gonna struggle with this one!
plan meals. (especially for weekends away) DONE. i have prepared fish for later.

tuesday and what not...

Woot. 4 days to my Ireland trip. I discovered the pricey hotel has a nice gym and a lovely pool that we can use for free so I am packing my workout stuff and swimming costume just in case we can squeeze in some time when we're not cooing over the baby! It would be nice to swim actually, haven't been in months. Its my Mam's birthday this week too. We're going out to celebrate on Saturday night before we leave for Ireland on sunday. So I am gonna weigh in Sat morning... pre-bad food, pre-holidayness. and then get back to regular weighing in upon return.

Also finally got my kettle bell out. Thank you Monica! Man, that is a work out and a half. Feeling pretty tired today but off to the gym later. Pushing through people. No whining here. I realised to keep my c25k on track I didn't have a day break between sessions so that might of made week3day1 a little harder. It was pretty intense. But it didn't kill me, definitely not looking forward to tomorrow...

On a positive note I have been taking part in Ang's summer challenge.
And I made it into the top ten challengers. Pretty happy, oh yeah! Take a look at some of the other numbers, madness! Thanks, Ang!

Monday's Check list:
minimum of 2 litres of water a day. DONE
10, 000 steps.11121 STEPS
no longer than 4 hours to blog.DONE
at least 5 portions of fruit/veg. 9.2 portions :D
45 minutes of exercise every day. 1.5 hours
at least one form out door exercise. did my c25k in the garden
complete my 30 day sports active on time this time. didnt have time
plan meals. (especially for weekends away) DONE. made chilli.

Pretty good first day I think! Every target hit except the sports active. Kinda half not my fault. I never get any tv time!

last chance work out week and the weigh in.

straight up with the numbers...

Current weight: 19 stones 5 pounds (271 lbs)
Previous weight: 19 stones 6 pounds (272 lbs)
Highest weight: 21 stones 3 pounds (297 lbs)
Weight loss this week: 1lbs GONE
Total weight lost: 1 stone 12 pounds (26 lbs)

Another pound gone. To be honest I was hoping for two. But I did I have fish and chips.(though i only ate half the small bag of chips) I wanted to hit 19 stones for the 9th of August. (for my trip) but there is no way I am gonna pull off 5lbs this week. However I am so gonna frickin' try. which is why this week is called LAST CHANCE WORK OUT WEEK. The biggest loser always does the last chance work out (i did that yesterday to in hopes to bolster my two slacking days... nada). So this week involves hitting every single mini target I made. upping my exercise 5 fold at least, hitting my calorie target and fulfilling my nutrition profile. NO WHINING JUST DOING. plus week three of c25k ups the jogging to like three minutes so I figure that has to help.

reminder of mini targets....
minimum of 2 litres of water a day.
10, 000 steps.
no longer than 4 hours to blog.
at least 5 portions of fruit/veg.
45 minutes of exercise every day.
at least one form out door exercise.
complete my 30 day sports active on time this time.
plan meals. (especially for weekends away)
save for the cleveland trip.

I am off to start week 3 c25k. Sounds intense but I AM going to do it. Even if it means repeating this week. Also my big fat hippo hooves have trampled a c25k across the garden, lol there is a little trail. I might try and do a few in the woodland area so I don't actually ruin the garden! Working on my own podcast too :D

ok. over and out. let the working out begin!

bits and um... pieces.

On the exercise front yesterday...still nothing special happened. I did my c25k bit and one small sports active one and i made it to 8 thousand steps. My eating... portion size, veg, water, all bang on. All calorie counted. I don't know why I'm not feeling it. I should be. The shrinking stomach should be pushing me further. It's raining again today. Sucky. Wanted to the third day c25k so I can get back to regular programming on Monday. *fingers crossed it picked up* the shitty gym I know go to has decided to shut on the weekend. AWESOME.

My parents are fighting. The atmosphere in the house is terrible. They're not speaking. In fact my dad slept on the couch in the lounge next to my air bed last night. He snores terrible. And the dog jumped into bed with me and took up half the space (my sister stayed out) I didn't have the heart to kick her out. So my sleep last night took a hit. But Wednesday night I got the perfect nights sleep. And what a difference it bloody does make.

I have felt the last couple of weeks is the hardest I have tried since starting this journey, even if the results have of July haven't supported this fact. I did notice though that July had the highest number of posts.... coincidence?....

I am doing a little challenge with myself. For so long I was eating the same breakfast day in and day out. Now I am trying to have something different everyday. OK people.... tell my your favourite breakfasts. INSPIRE ME.